My Emptying Nest...

The holidays are very special to me... all holidays... but the one that makes me smile most is Christmas... I love the warmth... the glow... the twinkle... the sparkle... the family-ness (is that a word??)!!! I love the togetherness... the time to spend with those you love... even when distance separates those you love... there is always that bond... phone calls... cards... parties... get-togethers... blessings... love... a time to be present... with family... with friends... even with strangers... the spirit of giving and receiving...

This year is the first year in 10 years that we will be able to spend the holidays with my parents... and the second time in 24 years!!! The boys get to spend time with their grandparents because all too soon they will not be with us... there will be memories... and "remember whens"... talks and laughter of times gone by... traditions... and togetherness!!

I have memories with my grandparents during the holiday season that brings feelings of love and warmth... I miss those days... the days when we would gather at Grandma & Grandpa Johnson's house... all the cousins, Aunts, and Uncles... playing games... movies... pictures... laughing and playing!!! All of us kids gathered around the tree with all Grandma's special ornaments... watching them spin and twirl... the lights twinkle... and oh the presents... all the wrapping and bows... and questions of what could be in each one... Is the biggest one mine... or Jessie's... or Danny's... Is there games??... Toys??.... or the dreaded clothes... Smiles spread across our faces as we open each one... thanking those who took the time to decide on the perfect gift for you... And watching Grandma and Grandpa open their gifts... some thoughtful... others gag gifts... Always a laugh and smile... no hard feelings... always grateful!!!

And Gram & Grandpa Davies... those Christmases just as special... less cousins... but the same really... family... trips up north to the snow and crispness... tree decorated with ornaments passed down from generation to generation... the lights that bubbled... don't ask me what they were... the birds perched on the limbs of the Douglas Fir or Great Northern Pine tree... cut down at the local tree farm... drug through the snow... sap sticking to our fingers... tinsel and stars... home made toys... cookies and candy... oh that hard candy and tasty ribbons or sugary sweetness... hot cocoa with marshmallows... watching the stars twinkle through the windows with the ever famous Santa in his sleigh with the reindeer in flight... the nativity scene and frosty... you know the plastic ones with the lights inside... and the lights... the ones on the eves of the house... the porch... and the garage...

I'm a Gigi (grandma) now and I miss all these things with my grand-kids!! No pictures.. no gatherings... no stories... no twinkling eyes... and bright smiling faces... They are closer now but just not the same as having them down the street or across town... Maybe a call... a card... a video chat... but no warm hugs... candy for the kiddos... presents... wrapping paper... bows... no hot cocoa... peppermints... no spoiling them and watching them smile as they open those brightly wrapped packages... they wonder if they are socks... a book... a toy or video game... I kinda feel cheated... I wonder if this is how Mom & Daddy felt all these years.. So close... but so far away!!

I'll make the best of it all... Cherish this year with Mama & Daddy... cause I could have been spending this holiday without Daddy... He died in front of me a total of 4 times this year... and yet he is here... here to smile with the boys and tell the same story over and over... the boys being polite as they let him do just that... tell that story over and over... I'll cherish this Christmas... and immerse myself in the blessings that I have this year... Mama & Daddy alive and... well mostly well... a beautiful healthy granddaughter.... grandson and granddaughter of the heart... a son-in-law... an adopted son... Bestie and her kids... and so many more friends that are like family... my in-laws... no matter the differences... all blessings... all things and people to be thankful for... and pray for another year to be together...